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Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him. Pirates never were very smart.

When Chuck Norris was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a KFC.

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.

Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card.

Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker's real father.

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

Chuck NorrisÂ’ iPod came with a real charger instead of just a USB cord.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.