Perkele, vatkaa sitä munaa horo!

+15 'C / 59 'F
This is as warm as it gets in Finland, so we'll start here. People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves. The Finns are out in the sun,getting a tan.

+10 'C / 50 'F
The French are trying in vain to start their central heating. The Finns plant flowers in their gardens.

+5 'C / 41 'F
Italian cars won't start, The Finns are cruising in cabriolets.

0 'C / 32 'F
Distilled water freezes. The water in Vantaa river (in Finland) gets a little thicker.

-5 'C / 23 'F
People in California almost freeze to death. The Finns have their final barbecue before winter.

-10 'C / 14 'F
The Brits start the heat in their houses. The Finns start using long sleeves.

-20 'C / -4 'F
The Aussies flee from Mallorca. The Finns end their Midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here.

-30 'C / -22 'F
People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth. The Finns start drying their laundry indoors.

-40 'C / -40 'F
Paris starts cracking in the cold. The Finns stand in line at the hotdog stands.

-50 'C / -58 'F
Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole. The Finnish army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.

-60 'C / -76 'F
Korvatunturi (the home for Santa Claus) freezes. The Finns rent a movie and stay indoors.

-70 'C / -94 'F
The false Santa moves south. The Finns get frustrated since they can't store their Kossu (Koskenkorva vodka) outdoors. The Finnish army goes out on winter survival training.

-183 'C / -297.4 'F
Microbes in food don't survive. The Finnish cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.

-273 'C / -459.4 'F
ALL atom-based movent halts. The Finns start saying "Perkele, it's cold outside today."

-300 'C / -508 'F
Hell freezes over, Finland wins the Eurovision Song Contest

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