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HAMMERFALL : LAST MAN STANDINGPerjantai 02.11.2007 02:45

kertosäe:
(I) I am the one, who lost control
But in the end I'll be the Last Man Standing!
(I)I am the one (the one)
who stole it's soul (it's soul)
forever going to be last man standing tall

Glorious
Nobel in my mind.
Everything I fight to win!
Taking all, and giving whatever my pride would let me...
Not backing down, not giving in
I wouldn't lose I couldn't die

kertosäe


I walk alone
With my head held high
Never felt that I belong
I stand my ground at all costs
Running through life With blind folds
Just for the right The right to be wrong

Nothing would rule my world but I

kertosäe

Nothing would rule my world but I

kertosäe (2x)

Seeing clear of what I've done
I refuse to let things go
I could never once admit I'm wrong
And what do I have to show
Seeing clear of what's at stake
And the things I have to change
I just hope I can, and it's not too late
To get a change to end this pain

[Ei aihetta]Tiistai 30.10.2007 23:13

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Ihan kivat bileet jälleen kerran, häpeningiä siihen samaan tyyliin kuin aina ennenkin. Ainakin mun kohdaltani, vähän jäi kaduttaan kun olis päässy yhen kivan tytön luo taas huudattaan sitä läpi yön mutta molempien kaveri porukka olivat menossa vastakkaisiin suuntiin joten se jäi meiltä nyt uusimatta..... mutta siihen palailemme jossain vaiheessa myöhemmin. Kiitokset kaikille kavereille jotka olivat paikalla jälleen kerran oli mukavat illan vietot vaikka jäikin ihan sika kova panetus koko illasta. Eritoten kiitokset sulle joka pitkästä aikaa piristit mun elämää ei niin sallitulla eikä todellakaan siveellisellä ja piillotetulla flirtilläs <sydän><sydän> olet säkin omalla tavallas mulle rakas..... ja hieman muutakin <virne><nam>

30 asiaa, jotka oppii pornoleffoistaSunnuntai 28.10.2007 03:35



1. Naiset pitävät korkokenkiä sängyssä.
2. Miehillä seisoo aina.
3. Kun mies nuolee naista, 10 sekuntia on tarpeeksi.
4. Jos tuntematon mies yllättää naisen masturboimasta, hän ei nolostu, vaan vaatii miestä naimaan häntä.
5. Naiset hymyilevät tyytyväisenä kun mies roiskii spermat hänen naamalleen.
6. Nuoret kauniit naiset nauttivat seksistä rumien keski-ikäisten miesten kanssa.
7. Naiset ääntelevät kiihkeästi ottaessaan suihin.
8. Nainen saa aina orgasmin samaan aikaan kun mies.
9. Suihinotto pelastaa naisen aina sakoilta.
10. Kaikki naiset ovat äänekkäitä sängyssä>
11. Ihmiset eivät osanneet naida 70-luvulla ilman taustalla soivaa kitarasooloa.
12. Kaikki rinnat ovat aitoja.
13. Miehen yleisin ja nautinnollisin seksitapa on lätkiä puolivelttoa penistä naisen takamukseen.
14. Miehet huutavat aina OH YEAH! kun he laukeavat.
15. Jos miehiä on kaksi, he lyövät kädet yhteen lauetessaan ja nainen hymyilee sille.
16. Tuplayhdyntä saa naiset hymyilemään vienosti.
17. Aasialaisia miehiä ei ole olemassa.
18. Jos törmäät luonnossa naiskentelevaan pariskuntaan, mies ei välitä vaikka työnnät mulkkusi naisen suuhun.
19. Kaikessa on juoni.
20. Kun ottaa naisen takaapäin, mies voi todella kiihottaa naista läpsimällä häntä persukselle.
21. Hoitajattaret ottavat miespotilailta suihin.
22. Miehet vetävät mulkkunsa aina ulos ennen laukeamista.
23. Kun tyttöystäväsi yllättää sinut naimasta hänen parasta ystävätärtään, hän suuttuu hetkeksi, mutta kun jatkat naimista, niin hän liittyy seuraan.
24. Naisilla ei ole päänsärkyja, eikä kuukautisia.
25. Kun nainen ottaa mieheltä suihin, miehen on tärkeää muistuttaa jatkuvasti "ime sitä".
26. Persereiät ovat aina puhtaita.
27. Kun mies laukeaa naisen mahalle/selkään/takapuolelle, niin nainen saa orgasmin.
28. Naiset näyttävät aina yllättyneiltä löytäessään miehen housuista peniksen.
29. Kun mies seisoo suihinoton aikana, hänen toinen käsi on aina naisen pään takana ja toinen ylpeästi lantiolla.
30. Miehet eivät anele

Palvelua oikealla kielellä.Torstai 25.10.2007 19:30



Mies meni pankkiin ja sanoi vanhemmalle, arvokkaan näköiselle
pankkineidille:

" Mä haluun vi**u avata tilin tähän vi*un pankkiin ja vähän vi*un nopeesti."
Pankkineiti alkoi kakomaan ja rykimään ja hieman tuohtui kuullessaan moista
kielenkäyttöä.
Pankkineiti kysyi mieheltä:"Mitä te oikein puhutte??"

Mies vastasi pankkineidille:
Mä haluun vi**u avata tilin tähän vi*un pankkiin ja vähän vi*un nopeesti."
Pankkineiti tuohtui enemmän ja naama punaisena sanoi miehelle:
"Minä en tuollaista kielenkäyttöä kuuntele, minä haen pankinjohtajan
paikalle."


Pankinjohtajakin saapui paikalle naama totisena.
"Neiti tässä kertoi, että käytätte kovin karkeaa kieltä pankissamme. Mikä on
ongelmanne?" johtaja kysyi mieheltä. Mies vastasi."Mää voitin tossa vi*un
lotossa vi**u 50 miljoonaa ja mä haluun vi**u avata sen vi*un tilin tähän
vi*un pankkiin ja vähän vi*un nopeesti."

Pankinjohtaja sanoi miehelle: "Ja tämä vi*un nutturapääkö ei ymmärtänyt noin
vi*un yksinkertaista asiaa."

[Ei aihetta]Torstai 25.10.2007 19:28

- jos kerrot miehelle että maailmankaikkeudessa on 300 miljardia tähteä, hän uskoo sen.
jos kerrot että penkki on maalattu, hänen on pakko koskea sitä ollakseen varma asiasta.

- herkuille ei jätetä tilaa, niille tehdään sitä.

- mitä nopeammin jää jälkeen, sitä enemmän on aikaa ottaa muut kiinni.

- raha puhuu... mutta minulle se sanoo vain hyvästi.

- terapia on kallista, kuplamuovin poksuttelu halpaa... valinta on sinun !

- jos koolla ei muka ole väliä, niin yritäppä nukkua hyttysen kanssa samassa huoneessa.

- naiset murehtivat asioista, joita miehet eivät muista.
miehet murehtivat asioista, joita naiset muistavat.



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KOIRAN OMISTUSLAITMaanantai 15.10.2007 23:08

1. Jos pidän siitä, se on minun.
2. Jos se on suussani, se on minun.
3. Jos pystyn ottamaan sen sinulta, se on minun.
4. Jos se oli minulla juuri äsken, se on minun.
5. Jos se on minun, se ei saa koskaan näyttää olevan sinun.
6. Jos pureskelen jotain palasiksi, kaikki palaset ovat minun.
7. Jos se vain näyttääkin siltä että se on minun, se on minun.
8. Jos näin sen ensin, se on minun.
9. Jos leikit jollakin ja laitat sen maahan, siitä tulee automaattisesti minun.
10. Jos se on rikki, se on sinun.
Tarvitset kolme ihmistä avuksi nostamaan koirasi eläinlääkärin tutkimuspöydälle.

Koirasi voi piilottaa kokonaisen tennispallon (tmv) huuliensa taakse ja näyttävän sanovan, "Mitä? Ei minulla ole suussa mitään!??"

Etsit vain farmaria tai suurempaa kulkuneuvoa autokaupasta.

Vaikka herätit jo miehesi, kuorsaaminen jatkuu yhä.

Hampaita harjatessasi joudut väistämään sivuun, kun koirasi haluaa juoda pesualtaasta.

Pysähdyt liikennevaloihin ja auto keinuu sivulta toiselle kun koirasi vaihtaa tarkkailuasemiaan ikkunasta toiseen.

Imuroit autoasi ja suurin osa karvoista löytyy auton katosta.

Kuukausittain koirabudjettisi ylittää asuntosi kuukausivuokran.

Eläinlääkärisi on laitattanut ison uima-altaan, uuden hienon kartanon, ostanut vesiskootterin ja porchen.

Olet joutunut opettamaan koirasi olemaan nuolematta astioita jotka ovat tiskialtaassa.

Koirasi näkee mitä kokkaat ja yrittää koko ajan neuvoa.

Pitelet koiraasi polviesi välissä kun ovikello soi ja löydät itsesi pian ovelta.

Pizzalähetti soittaa portilta että pizzasi ovat nyt täällä.

Koirasi kurottaa olkasi takaa McDonaldsin autokaistalla ja kassaneiti saa miltei sydänkohtauksen ojentaessaan vaihtorahaa.

Hankit suuren laajakuvatelevision etkä vieläkään näe ohjelmia.

KUINKA KOIRAN PENNUSTA OTETAAN KUVAMaanantai 15.10.2007 23:00

1. Ota filmirulla pakkauksesta ja laita se kameraan.

2. Ota pakkaus pennun suusta ja laita se roskikseen.

3. Nosta pentu roskiksesta ja harjaa sen kuonosta kahvinporot.

4. Valitse hyvä tausta kuvaukselle.

5. Ruuvaa kamera jalustaan, tarkista että salama ja tarkennus toimivat.

6. Etsi pentu ja vedä likainen sukka sen suusta.

7. Laita pentu valittuun kohtaan ja asetu kamerajalustan taakse.

8. Unohda valittu kohta ja konttaa pennun perässä.

9. Aseta tarkennus kohdalleen toisella kädellä kun samalla houkuttelet pennun pois toisella kädellä.

10. Hae nenäliina ja pyyhi pois kuononjälki linssistä.

11. Heitä katti pihalle ja hae paperia pyyhkiäksesi kissan raapimaa naarmua pennun kuonossa.

12. Yritä saada pennun huomio vinguttamalla lelua pääsi yläpuolella.

13. Laita silmälasisi taas päähän ja tarkista menikö kamera rikki.

14. Ponnahda pystyyn kuin vieteriukko ja tartu pentua niskasta ja sano: "Ei, ei - tuo tehdään ulkona!"

15. Hae lasi ja hyvää viskiä.

16. Istu lempinojatuoliisi, nosta jalat sohvapöydälle, maistele viskiä ja päätä että alat ensi töiksesi huomenna opettaa pennulle "Istu" ja "Seuraa".