IRC-Galleria

Vittu-sanan AINOAT soveliaat käyttökerrat kautta maailmanhistorian:

"Enpä arvannut, että he suuttuisivat noin vitusti."
Osama bin Laden, 2001

"Hei halooo, kuka vittu siitä saisi tietää?!"
Bill Clinton, 1999

"Paikallisia sadekuuroja... ja vitut!"
Nooa, 4341 eKr

"Missä vitussa me ollaan?!"
Amelia Earhart, 1937

"Haluatte minkä tuohon vitun kattoon?!"
Michelangelo, 1566

"Miten vitussa sinä ratkaisit tuon?"
Pythagoras, 126 eKr

"Onhan se niin vitusti hänen näköisensä!"
Picasso, 1926

"Joka vitun taukki ymmärtää tämän."
Einstein, 1938

"Mistä vitusta nuo kaikki intiaanit tulivat?"
Kenraali Custer, 1877

"Mikä vittu se oli?"
Hiroshiman pormestari, 1945

"Vitut täällä mitään jäävuoria ole."
Titanicin kapteeni, 1912

"Kuka vittu jätti keulaportin auki?"
Estonian kapteeni, 1994

"Aja nyt vittu kovempaa!"
Prinsessa Diana, 1997

"Miks just mun pitää jäädä tänne vitun moduliin venaan?"
Apollo 11-astronautti Michael Collins, 1969

"Vittu tää on pelkkä flunssa."
Aleksanteri Suuri, 323 eKr

"Ketä kiinnostaa, jos me vallataan joku vitun Kuwait."
Saddam Hussein, 1990

"Kuka vittu laukaisi sen torpedon jo putkessa?"
Kurskin kapteeni Gennadiy P. Liachin, 2000

"Mitkä vitun hobitit?"
Sauron, 2945 kolmatta aikaa

Mun vatta on ihan pirun kipee ja tuntuu et koht lentää laatta!!! en viitti syödä mitää vaikka vatta kurnii ku sammakko. :D Älkää ees kysykö miks mul o vatta kipee, kukin saa mielessään miettii sitä..
Huome johonkin spinginniin (ihanaa jos osais ees kirjottaa sen!) ja pitää pulittaa siitäki 4 euroo!! ja sit viel sen jälkeen 5 tuntii!!! Enkkuu!!!!!!! Niin ja enkä päässy ees tutoriksi, no ei sitten jos ei kelpaa ja miks mä pääsen hesaan vas 2 viikon pääst!!!! (no helpotus et oon siel koko viikon!) Mitäs tjäivät paljosta paitsi!! nyt mä masennun kohta!! :(...
Miks suvi ei voi olla Halikossa ässä viel vois purkaa tunteitaan? Niin olin klipee koko helkutin vkl ja en päässy markkinoille, ja kuitenki olis ollu isoskoulutus mutten päässy sinnekkään ja sit viel suvi oli Halikos sillon ja en saanu nähä sitä koska mä olin KIPEEE!!! on varmaan tulle kaikille selville! :D:D mä oon kunnossa nyt vaikka verta nenästä vuotaakin aina kun niistän!

Kiitós jos olet jaksanu lukea pienen tunne purkaukseni mut ei sille mitään voi jos on ollu vittumainen oli jo lähes viikon!!! !!!

P.s viel sekin et Marjo on espanjassa yli 30 asteen helteessa ottamassa aurinkoo ja näkemäs vitun hyvän näköisiä jätkiä ja mä riudun koulun penkeillä ja saan rämpiä tuol ulkona sateessa ja pakkasessa!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Auta kissaa valloittaa irc-galleria ja lisää se päiväkirjaasi...


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Jeeess!!! tän jakson viimeinen koe (siis psykologia) on ohi ja ei kokeita enää kuukauteen!! mut ens jakso on yta 1 eli tervetuloa matikka, enkku, äidinkieli ja liikunta:D
Ja tänään nähään TERAA!!! Pitää kyl siivota eenenku lähen mihinkään koska se on Ritva tädin käsky!

Kiitos teille tärkeille vkl<3<3 kuuden viikon pääst tuun vast hesaan!:(.. ja pääsin turvallisesti kotiin :D

1. OIKEA NIMESI
Mette

2. GANGSTA NIMESI: (nimesi kolme ensimmäistä kirjainta + izzle.)
Metizzle

3. SALAPOLIISI NIMESI: (lempivärisi ja lempieläimesi)
vihreä kotka

4. SAIPPUAOOPPERA NIMESI: (toinen nimesi + kotikatusi)
Krista Päivölänkuja

5. STAR WARS NIMESI: (sukunimesi kolme ensimmäistä kirjainta, nimesi kaksi ensimmäistä kirjainta)
Väime

6. SUPERSANKARINIMESI: (toinen lempivärisi, lempijuomasi).
Sininen Fanta

7. IRAKILAINEN NIMESI: (nimesi eka kirjain, sukunimesi kolmas kirjain, mikä tahansa kirjain toisesta nimestäsi, äitisi tyttönimen toinen kirjain, isäsi toisen nimen kolmas kirjain, sisaruksesi nimen ensimmäinen kirjain, äitisi tyttönimen viimeinen kirjain)
Mahdoton tehtävä!!!

8. TODISTAJANSUOJELU NIMESI: (äitisi toinen nimi)
Hannele

9. GOOTTI NIMESI: (musta + lemmikkisi nimi)
Musta killi (on oikeestan serkun lemmikki:D)

IHMISET
1# Kenen kanssa vietit aikaa eniten? -Jutan ja veeran<3<3<3
2# Keiden kanssa parhaat kesämuistot? - Sinujen ja halikon srk:n kanssa
3# Tapasitko uusia? - toooosi paljon!
4# Riitelitkö usein? - Kai niitä pieni riidan poikasia oli
5# Ihastuitko/rakastuitko? - Sitä vartenhan kesä on olemassa!
6# Yhdenillan juttuja? - Kai ne oli muttei tarkotuksella
7# Petyitkö ihmisiin? - todellakin
8# Olisitko halunnut viettää enemmän aikaa kenenkään kanssa? - Halikon srk:n kanssa
9# Vietitkö liikaa aikaa jonkun kanssa? - Menetin muuten niin ihanasta kesästän kuukauden erään takia!

ITSE
1# Mitkä asiat kesässä olivat tärkeitä? - ilmat, Tärkeet ystävät ja luottamus
2# Oletko muuttunut jotenkin, miten? - Ettei mun kannata luottaa ihan kaikkeen
3# Haluaisitko muuttaa jotain? - en oikeestaan
4# Oletko oppinut uutta? - todellakin! älä ota exää takas jos se o kerran jo jättäny
5# Kadutko jotain? - kadun
6# Olisitko jättänyt jotain tekemättä? - todellakin!!
7# Olisitko tahtonut tehdä jotain mitä et tehnyt? - olla Suvin kanssa enemmän kesän aikana
8# Tahtoisitko elää jonkun päivän uudestaan? - Kesä 1 '07 riparin!!<3<3
9# Olisitko tahtonut jättää jonkun päivän elämättä? - en. kaikki päivät pitää elää koska niistä oppii aina jotain uutta..

MUISTOJA
1# Matkustelitko? - Ruottissa käytiin suk
2# Ulkomailla vai kotimaassa? - no siis ruottis, enimmäkseen hesassa oleskelin mut kyl sitä jyväskylässä tuli kans käytyy..
3# Kävitkö festareilla? -Myötätuuli rockissa kävin suvin kaa
4# ...Jos et, mihin olisit tahtonut? - Kävin mut oisin halunnu ankkaan
5# Bileissä? - oli yhet koti "pippalot" jonkun juipin kotona :D
6# Miiteissä? - en kai
7# Rannalla? - Alkukesastä käytiin riparilla
8# Parhaat muistot? - Kesä 1 '07 ripari!!!
9# Parhaat päivämäärät? - kerron myöhemmin
10# Paskimmat päivät? - no, emt

MATERIALISTI
1# Shoppailitko usein? -joo.. heti liksa päivänä!
2# Parhaat ostokset? - Mustat pillifarkut
3# Turhimmat ostokset? - jotkut pikku ostokset
4# Päihteitä/ruokaa/levyjä/vaatteita/meikkejä/matkalippuja/jotain muuta? - mul meni rahaa noihin kaikkiin vaikkei tullu mulle itelleni:D
5# Paras ruoka/juoma/jäätelö? - Hamppari/Fanta/joku suklaa

LOPUKSI
1# Oletko tyytyväinen tähän kesään? - en ainakaan unohda<3:D
2# Oliko paras kesä tähän mennessä? - Ei oikeestaan
3# ...Jos ei, miksi? kesä 06 ei voita mikää!!<3<3
4# Millainen tulee ensi kesästä? - Kattoo jos se olis taas ikimuistettava ku mähän täytän sillon 18!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Olen 58% mies ja 42% nainen;)

Tuli sekin nyt todistettuu ..

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

Yhtä toivon enemmän kuin muuta.
Paljon sen vuoksi antaisin,
Että tuntisit oikeesti
Miten paljon sä haavoitit.
Ja miten kerran toisensa,
Jälkeen se kaikki uudestaan nöyryytti.
Älä väitä ettei sulla ole muka muistoo.
Vai pidätkö sä mua tyhmänä,
Jolla ei ole väliä?
Itsetäänselvyytenä, lastenpalapelinä?

kertosäe:
Pokkaa sul on ainakin, se on käynyt selväksi.
Liikaa oot sen varjolla,
Jo varastanut anteeksi.
Mistä sait sen käsityksen,
Että noin voi tehdä toisille.
Mut se mun täytyy kyllä myöntää,
Sul on pokkaa ainakin.

Mä en tahtois kantaa turhaa kuormaa.
Varsinkaan kun se mitään muuta ei.
Mut tekisitkö sä uudestaan saman,
Jos saisit valita?
Onko sussa jäljellä,
Palaakaan inhimillisyydestä?

kertosäe

Joo mä tiedän mitä tunnen,
Mut sitä koskaan ääneen sano en.
Mä pelkään että joskus peilistä
Katsoo sun kaltainen.
Mä en suutu enkä raivoo, enkä huuda,
Siihen suostu enää en.
Yksi ainut katse jota et ymmärrä kuitenkaan,

Kertoo enemmän kuin kaikki sanat yhteensä.
Sitä mitä tapahtuu syvällä mun sisällä
Ja sitä mikä odottaa vielä sitä hetkeä,
Kun on vapaa kaikesta mitä kannan mukana.
Tiedän kuka sinä oot, mut onko sulla hajua,
Sitä mihin oon päässyt ilman apua?
Oikeastaan minun pitäisi kai kiittää sinua,
Avasit mun silmät, en usko enää satuja.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

Miksi miehen peniksessä on reikä ?
-Täytyyhän aivojen saada ilmaa.

Miksi miehet eivät kokkaa?
-Siksi, ettei vielä ole keksitty pihviä, jonka voisi valmistaa leivänpaahtimessa.

Miksi miehet kuluttavat niin paljon kaloreita naidessaan?
-Koska panon jälkeen he juoksevat ympäri kaupunkia kehumassa siitä kavereillee.

Miksi miehet masturboivat?
-Saa harrastaa seksiä rakkaimpansa kanssa.

Miksi miehet nousevat keskellä yötä sängystä?
-25 % mennäkseen jääkaapille, 25 % mennäkseen vessaan ja 50 % mennäkseen kotiin.

Miksi miehet pitävät kalastuksesta?
- Koska silloin heillä on mahdollisuus kerran elämässään kuulla naisen suusta sanat: vau miten iso!

Miksi miesten tieteelle lahjoittamia aivoja pidetään parempina kuin naisten?
-Koska miesten aivoja ei ole koskaan käytetty.

Miksi nainen ei räpäytä silmiään esileikin aikana?
-Hän ei ehdi.

Miksi tarvitaan miljoona siittiötä yhden munasolun hedelmöittämiseen?
-Miesten tapaan siittiötkään eivät pysähdy kysymään ajo-ohjeita.

Mikä on miehen käsitys raskaasta työstä?
-Rintaliivien tuplahakasten aukaiseminen.

Mikä on paras tapa pitää mies tyytyväisenä makuuhuoneessa?
-Tuoda sinne televisio.

Millainen on maailman nopein mies?
-Sellainen, joka nukahtaa ennen kuin tulee.

Millainen on mies, joka ei jätä ketään kylmäksi?
-Hän on todennäköisesti töissä krematoriosa.

Mitä eroa on tyhmällä ja älykkäällä miehellä?
-Ei mitään. Molemmat luulevat tietävänsä kaiken.

Mitä yhteistä on miehillä ja mikroaaltouuneilla?
-Kolmekymmentä sekuntia ja valmista on.

Miehen elämän ensimmäinen kokemus on tulla ulos naisen vartalosta.
Lopun elämäänsä hän käyttääkin sitten päästäkseen takaisin sisään.