IRC-Galleria

The European Commission has just given out a statement sayin that English is definitely the perfect official EU language. German or French can't offer any kind of competition to it. Anyway, Her Majesty's Government agreed that English spelling could go through some improvement and has accepted a five-year plan under the title of "Euroenglish".

In the first year, "S" will replace the soft "C". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants of the Union jump with joy. the "K" will appear instead of the hard "C". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik interest in the sekond year, when the troublesome "PH" will be replaced with "F". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the third year, we kan expekt publik akseptanse of the new spelling to reach the point where more komplikated changes are possible. They will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always been a problem to akurate spelling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "E"s in the language is disgrasful, and they should go away.

By the 4th yar, pepl wil aksept steps such as replasing "TH" with "Z" and "W" with "V".

During ze fiftz yar ve kan drop ze unesesary "O" from vords having "OU" and the same changes vud of kors be usd viz ozer kombinations of letters. After ze fifz yar, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.