VIRTUAL FAKEMAN in Wonder Underground aka キャプテン★0010

[Ei aihetta]Keskiviikko 23.07.2008 16:39

08.02.2009 Suomi, Helsinki - Gloria

*______* tahtoo!!!!Tiistai 13.05.2008 03:29

eve feat. alemmuuskompleksi [BIG TIME]Maanantai 12.05.2008 23:59

no more of the awful fuckin devianart for me.

[Ei aihetta]Maanantai 12.05.2008 23:34

Jasmine: Rape Paper Scissor!
Jasmine:.....I MEANT ROCK
Ashy: OHGOD WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU. *doublefacepalm*
Once upon a time in the kingdom of Under Code, there lived a beautiful blonde princess named Riku. Riku was a devout member of the Church of Kisakianity and attended services every single Sunday to pray for success in his upcoming marriage. There was much unrest in the kingdom, so much turmoil that the houses of Iori and Matoi were fleeing the country, but Queen Jun remained loyal and decided that his adopted son Riku must marry in order to keep peace.

“You must marry Prince Kisaki, head of the Church of Kisakianity!” Jun had decided.

Upon hearing the news, Princess Riku had gone starry-eyed and his heart fluttered with joy. “It’s always been my secret dream to be the bride of Prince Kisaki! I’ve heard he’s so noble and tall! I vow to be a good wife and do everything he tells me to do until the end of my days!”

Riku was terribly excited about marrying Kisaki, even though he had never set eyes upon the prince’s face. Kisaki never left his castle anymore and it was rumored that he had mysteriously disappeared, but Riku refused to believe the awful stories. Every night before he went to bed he would sing “Kami Uta”, his favorite Kisakian hymn, and then look up at the moon and wish for a happy life after he married.

One fine Sunday morning, Princess Riku got up bright and early and made himself look pretty for church. He brushed his hair, grabbed his Under Code Bible, and bid farewell to Queen Jun as he stepped outside into the sunshine. When he arrived at church, however, his mood of rainbows and butterflies disappeared because the kind old preacher was nowhere in sight. Instead, a strange new preacher had taken his place and Riku was frightened at first!

“What has happened to my teacher in Kisakianity?” he asked in despair. “How will I be able to worship my future husband the same way again?”

“I’m Father Tadashi,” said the new preacher. “Sit down and open up your bible to the Psalm of Material Pain.”

Riku had no choice but to obey. “Yes, Father Tadashi.” He obediently took a seat in the front pew and sang with his beautiful voice. As he studied the mysterious new preacher, he couldn’t help noticing that he was tall and extremely beautiful, possessing the image of perfection. He appeared to be an ideal Kisakian leader and soon gained Riku’s approval.

After church, Riku skipped home and asked Queen Jun, “Am I getting married to Prince Kisaki yet?”

“Not yet,” Jun replied.

Riku pouted. “Will I ever marry Prince Kisaki? Or is he just a myth after all? I’ve never seen him!”

Jun patted Riku on the head and kissed his face like a good adoptive mother. “Of course you’ll marry him. Kisaki is a very busy man since he’s both a prince and head of the church. He founded the religion of Kisakianity on top of all that and I’m sure he has to work very hard to regularly pay all his house and church bills. Don’t you want your husband to be able to support you well?”

“Yes,” said Riku. “Kisaki must be a very hardworking man if he can be a religious icon, a member of royalty, and a dutiful taxpayer! I feel proud to be arranged into marriage with him!”

Every single day Riku would ask when his wedding would be, but Jun never had an answer. Kisaki still had not come to visit his future bride, but strangely Riku wasn’t as hurt as he should have been because he had recently become quite occupied with church. Ever since the arrival of Father Tadashi, church had become the most enjoyable aspect of Riku’s life. Seeing the preacher once a week wasn’t nearly enough and soon Riku found himself visiting the church every single day, even when there weren’t services. Tadashi lived in the church and always seemed pleased by Riku’s frequent visits, though it was difficult to tell since he smiled rarely.

The truth was that Riku was falling madly in love with the new preacher and couldn’t stop. Every time he left the church, his heart fluttered wildly with passion for Tadashi, but then when he arrived home he would sit in his room and suddenly feel sad. Even though he wasn’t married yet, he felt like he was being unfaithful to Kisaki and was overcome with guilt when he thought of how wonderful Tadashi was.

“I’m so confused!” he wailed. “How can I possibly marry Prince Kisaki when I’m in love with my preacher? I’m a bad princess!”

The time finally came when Riku decided to confess his dark secret. The church was empty when he arrived and he found Father Tadashi sitting all alone reapplying his lipstick. Riku knelt to the ground and looked humbly down at the floor, the image of piety and virtuousness. “Oh Father Tadashi, I have a horrible confession to make! You must hear me out!”

Tadashi put the lipstick away and stared down at the church’s most devoted worshipper. “What could you have possibly done wrong, Princess Riku?”

Riku proceeded to tell the whole entire story about his arranged marriage to Kisaki and his desperate attraction to Tadashi. He was weeping by the end of the tale and Tadashi kindly wiped his eyes for him.

“Don’t cry. I have a confession of my own,” he said. “For I am not really Father Tadashi at all!” He stood at his tallest, most imposing height and took on a dramatic stance. “I am actually… Prince Kisaki!”

Riku nearly fainted away. “Are you really?” He looked up at the other man adoringly, hoping his words to be true.

“Yes, my beautiful Princess Riku. And soon we will be married once my good name is restored throughout the land. I had to go into hiding and take on a false identity because the Church of Dir en grey means to persecute me and spread lies about me so that I’ll grow unpopular and never become king.”

“That’s simply terrible!” gasped Riku, covering his mouth in shock. “Those Dir en greyists are wicked!”

Prince Kisaki nodded in agreement. “The Church of Dir en grey’s members have accused me of beating and raping their Prophet Kyo, and then aborting him of the fetus I impregnated him with. That’s a lie, since I would never wish to touch a miserable little creature like Kyo. I ought to construct a catapult and fire a mass of pebbles at him!”

Riku jumped about with delight. “You should!” He put his arms around Kisaki and hugged him tightly. “Those idiots are preventing our marriage! Let me handle them for you!”

“But Princess Riku, it’s dangerous there. The maggots and cockroaches could eat you! You could be raped on Queen Jun’s grave!”

“I don’t care!” Riku declared heroically. Before Kisaki could stop him, he got into a carriage and traveled to the foreboding Church of Dir en grey, where everything looked dark and depressed. A service was currently being held, but when the worshippers heard Riku’s carriage approaching, they all rushed out of the church in an angry rush.

“Kisaki is a bad man!” they cried. “Our poor, frail little Kyo still hasn’t recovered from the rape trauma! He’s incredibly delicate and has sensitive feelings!”

Riku ignored the Dir en greyists’ complaints and used his lovely voice to sing about how wonderful and kind Kisaki really was. Everyone was quieted by his song and some people even wept upon hearing how achingly gorgeous it was. Once Riku was finished singing, he smiled and announced what a good wife he intended to be, then rode away in his carriage without another word.

The Dir en greyists still fiercely hated Kisaki, but Riku had prompted them to leave the prince alone for a while and find somebody else to harass. Kisaki no longer needed to hide in the church and moved back to his castle, taking Riku with him. Shortly afterwards, Prince Kisaki and Princess Riku were happily married in the Church of Kisakianity. Queen Jun cried tears of joy at the wedding, and Iori and Matoi miraculously returned, ready to serve their prince once more.

Riku was the happiest princess in all of Under Code. After becoming Kisaki’s wife, he and his new beautiful husband had plenty of sex every single day. Riku eventually had ten babies and named all of them Kisaki so they could carry on the name of Kisakianity’s founder.

Later on, Kisaki found himself burdened with tax problems and got into trouble over it. He could barely afford to feed Riku and his children for nearly a year, but the problem was solved when he married off his kids to eligible princesses with massive dowries. Fortunately the Prophet Kyo and his husband Lord Kaoru had many wealthy princesses, so an alliance between the Church of Kisakianity and the Church of Dir en grey was formed.

Kisaki and Riku continued to make passionate love until the end of their days and lived happily ever after.

The end.


valehtelin.Maanantai 12.05.2008 01:48

1. eve
2. evee-chan
3. sinä

1. anarchy_hostage
2. undecided
3. 3cch1

1. tukka (sais kyl laittaa mut pituus o n<3)
2. tatskat
3. kuulo (...XDDDD)

1. minä
2. luonne
3. mitä jäi jälelle

1. örkkimörkit aka ötöket etc
2. pimee
3. eläminen

1. musiikki
2. herääminen (muutenhan ei tuu päivää)
3. vesi

1. lämpösukat
2. vanha kulahtanu paita
3. vanhat kulahtaneet housut

1. dido
2. 9goats black out
3. atreyu

1. oon elossa
2. oon vittuuntunut
3. oon väsynyt

1. hiukset
2. kädet
3. luusto

1. musiikki
2. lukemine
3. musiikki

1. mennä Helsinkii
2. mennä keikalle
3. mennä vittuun täältä

1. tatskaa
2. mitä pojille lahjaks
3. siivoomista

1. Helsinki
2. Hiroshima
3. Seoul

1. Miro
2. Kai
3. Tero

1. saada sleevet
2. matkustella ihan pirusti
3. ostaa talon

μελαγχολίαKeskiviikko 05.03.2008 00:08

Melancholia, in contemporary usage, is a mood disorder of non-specific depression, characterized by low levels of enthusiasm and low levels of eagerness for activity. In a modern context, "melancholy" applies only to the mental or emotional symptoms of depression or despondency; historically, "melancholia" could be physical as well as mental, and melancholic conditions were classified as such by their common cause rather than by their properties. Similarly, melancholia in ancient usage also encompassed mental disorders which would later be differentiated as schizophrenias or bipolar disorders.

[go away]

[Ei aihetta]Maanantai 03.03.2008 20:18

Flaikkuja ja An Cafen lippu, menkäätten huutamaan poies :D

[Ei aihetta]Perjantai 08.02.2008 01:11

Why is these potatoes in a catbasket?

Well, it is Intetsu after all...