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We all like the devils game
love, hate, ambition, fame.
Up we fly and down we fall
then before you know
you've sold your soul.
You're dead inside
the game lost it's thrill
You're lost and gone
take the pill.

It's all been done
but the lust for thrill
isn't yet gone.
Take the pill.
Start the fall,
finally lose it all.
End it before
you know what you've done.

You play by the devils rules
you won't need more.
The devils game
gives you it all.
Like an efficient drug
you'll give everything you've got,
just to get the right amount
to get high again,
so you won't realize
how lost you are
and can't get out..

***

How can you blame,
that i dont feel the pain?
That's the reason why
I did those horrible things to you.
'cause this pain has made me numb.

Torn to pieces
pushed aside
fallen angel
sucked dry.

No way to ease the pain
nothing left to lose
nothing to say
nowhere lower to go.
I've lost it all,
I've got nothing to fear!

Why did I let you brake me twice?
Why cant I learn the rules of these games..
What you want, you can never have,
what you need, you'll have to beg.
Nothing's easy, nothing's free
why did I let you do that to me?
Why am I being so weak?

I've made my desicion
I'll let our dream go.
I wont give another shot,
I wont play on your rules.
Fuck you, it's an istinct
of self-preservation.
Fuck you, you ain't getting another word.
I've had enough of this shit you call love.
You go play your games,
Fuck you. Don't toy with me.

**

It's not good enough for you
what ever I do.
It's not enough if I care.
Not no matter how much I love.
You just throw that shit on me
treat me like trash.
I just tried to love
as an incomplete girl can.

Well, it's okey
I did learn something.
When you get that shit on you
you dont want to be the one
pouring that on anyone.

But all these things you just cant forgive
though you believe in the good in him.
Some things are just too much for me too,
though I never thought that I'd feel this way with you..

They tell me on the street "you're a sinner"
that's maybe true, but who is not?
We're all assholes, twisted pieces of shit somehow
you can't help it, you're so full of yourself.
Everybody fails once, everybody betrays someone.
You should be able to forgive it all
but too much shit is just too much.
Even for me, who just used to take it all.

***

***

If this was easy i wouldn't be so bound to this.
I love our problems, I like the hard way.
We make it difficult, but getting through it all
is the feeling I miss, so it's the trouble I love.
I love the way it is, just as we are.

The feeling of winning
makes it worth the pain.
If there just is passion
it's worth everything.

Seeing you hurt, your feelings still alive.
Being hurt myself, feeling the uncertainty.
Brings in only passion
it's indescribable.
Playing only together
makes us unseparable.
Experience together,
grow into each other,
just remembering the love,
we can make it unbreakable.

If we can get through this
we can't be torn apart.
'cause together love and passion
make it irresistible.

We can fight, we can scream
we can cry, we can run.
It's only temporary
'cause if it's true love,
those can't tear us apart,
it could be forever,
if we held on tight enough,
it would keep us together.

It's the lust for blood
in my soul.
It's the passion for pain
in my heart.
It's my libido
that keeps me driving on.
I can't stop now
I already have a addiction on
you, us, our difficult passioned love.

We're inseparable
It's indescribable
It's irresistible
It's unbreakable
It maybe only temporary
but it's our passioned love.

will it melt with the snow?
love is a devil

***

They were always watching her, since the downer school.
She was always pretty, but she never had a clue
how cold shed grow, when the dreamboy would go
just leave her alone in this world so cruel.

She stole his heart took the second in line.
You think that's harch, no it's just the game.
Don't hate the player, it's not her fault.
She's drunk and beautiful, what can you say.
Can do what she wants, in every way.

You wish you could get her
she's a hard fish to catch.
You'd only taste blend
she's tasted excess.
Is there any way
she'd notice you again?
Oh darling, I doubt that
men are only toys for her tonight.

She can walk across the room
knowing they're all watching her.
Tonight she's on her best again,
tonight she's ready to go!

She's the one, she's the holiday whore
of the girls nobody just could be more.
All the boys on her feet
she's just looking for a seat,
they'll bring her the wine
wishing to get to go for a ride.

After all she's just tired
of looking for a romance.
Accidently she once lost
the only one she found.
Now she's grown cold
our own holiday whore,
just to cover the loneliness inside
she plays this evil game.

She doesn't care what you have to say.
She doesn't care what you have to give.
It don't really matter what ever you try
she's grown cold, she'll just get another ride.

She's the star of the night, the girls are all jealous.
She doesn't care the party's always around her on.
Our own holiday whore.

She's rebelling bad, crossing the lines
leaving out of town, reaching for her dreams.
Driving the wrong side, taking risks again
to feel the adrenalin, run through her veins
to feel alive tonight, taking excess of cocaine.

She suffered the pain, just to know she did it all.

***

I said it out loud, this ain't working.
I'm too tired, I wonder if we'll make it.
I reach for your hand, you dont take it
we're at a crossroad, we gotta make a choise.
Do it, I've told you my story.

Yes it's easier to run,
go that way around,
but do you want to risk it
can you afford to lose it all?
You should have given a chance
you could have got more...
If there's no love left
there's nothing to fight for.

I cannot believe that you wouldn't fight for love.
We would have made it together
could have made all our dreams come true.
But by letting my tired and reaching hand go
you made it all worth nothing
by that you just lost it all.

If it's not my love anymore
what is it that you want?
Did you lie to me
when you said it's all you've got?
I may have now broken both of us
but if you make me leave and take that bus..
I wont come back, it will be forever
I dont want to remember that we even were together.

Give me back our memories
come and heal these scars.
Take that reaching hand of mine
I dont want to lose it all.
I cant believe that you were ready to close that door...
I wish you had told me what went wrong.

You weren't worth every laugh every smile.
You weren't worth every tear every touch.

I really thought that you loved me
I thought I meant more.
I didn't know that to you
I was only a wind in your hair.
I loved you, you were my world
to me nothing meant more.

It was you who destroyed it all.
I hope you suffer.

***

Standin in front yard of my once been home.
Thinking of the times in there, it never felt home.
So I left an' took the road away from there
got the change, now ..it's time to go!!!

Got the change for once to live
keep on going, riding the night.
Flying high up in the sky
it's fine this way i'll never lose time.
On the run, just having fun
they'll think i've lost my mind!!

Drivin' the wrong side of the road,
crashing with the upcoming cars
and again, reaching for the stars
trying to look better,
trying to become something more.

Your eyes on me they give more power
to walk the streets satisfied and glowing.
To rise up higher, higher above others
reaching for the highest stars
seeing myself becoming one.

Now you're free to take what you want.
Now you're free to brake those you hate.
Go and do it,
go and do it,
go and do it ..to become something..
So much above them, totally in a different crew
just flying, flying, flying..
among the stars.

I ran in to you, just a normal guy
just like those, I just looked down to.
Something in my head kept me thinkin of you
i wont be obsessed about you..
im tellin you..
You've gotta take everything you've always wanted.
You've just gotta brake those you've always hated.
You gotta do it,
gotta do it,
gotta do it ..to be like me..
So much above them, totally in a different crew
just flying, flying, flying..
among the stars

We're gonna take everything we've always wanted.
We're gonna brake everyone we've ever hated.
We're gonna do it,
gonna do it,
gonna do it ..to be together..
So much above them, totally in a different crew
I'm just flying, flying, flying..
among the stars,
with you.

***

Rakastan syksyä yli kaiken kun puista lentelee kauniin värisiä lehtiä tuulessa ja niillä voi jäädä koulunpihalle leikkimään, ja koulu tuo mukanaan uusia ystäviä ja muita uusia juttuja.
Musta tuli juuri maailman ihanimman pienen Juho-pojan sylikummi ja tuo samainen asia on sulattanut mun aivot ihan sellaseksi perunamuusin tapaiseksi mömmöksi. :) Tuntuu ettei mikään takaisku enää pudota mua pilvistä.. :)
Sit kaikki tulevat kavereiden synttäripippalot ja omat synttärit tulossa piristää ku tietää että voi nähdä paljon kavereita yhdellä kertaa ja pitää ihan törkeen hauskaa silloin :)
Muutenki jotenki herään joka aamu ihan ylipirteänä ja se on mukavaa kun jaksaa heti aamusta piristää kaikkia muitakin hillumalla ensin siel missä asustelen ja sitten koulussa :)
Talven tulokin piristää eikä pienet ongelmat enää tunnu missään. Elämä on ihanaa! :D

Toivottavasti mun hyvä fiilis tarttuu ihmisiin, ettei kenellekkään iske mikään typerä syysmasennus, jolloin ne vetäytyy omiin nurkkiinsa, eikä sitten enää näe ketään missään :x .. Vaikka kaikki on perjaatteessa ihan sekaisin niin ei se tunnu edes pahalta kun tietää että pian asiat on kuitenkin paremmin :) Dindin :)

Onneks on olemassa niin ihania ihmisiä kun mun ystävät, ne piristää jokapäivä jollain tavalla, pelkästään jo olemalla olemassa ja on ihanaa ajatella että ne ihmiset välittää ja on tyytyväisiä, ellei just tällä hetkellä niin nekin löytää syitä olla iloisia kun katselee kaikkea tarpeeksi tarkasti :) Rakastan kaikkea ja kaikkia tällä hetkellä ja oon yllättävän onnellinen pitkästä aikaan, se on mukava tunne :)

Viimeöiset unet ei oikeen tykänny ideasta et jaksaisin mennä kouluun tänään.. Näin vaa unia jostain joukkomurhista ja verta ja ruumiita oli kaikkialla, tulipaloja, kostomurhia, palaneita ihmisiä, ruumiiden kuljetusveneitä täynnä ruumiita, kauppakeskuksia joiden lattiat oli täynnä verijälkiä, verisiä katuja ja vähän lisää ruumiita.. Ja lähes jokaisessa unessa ne pari ihmistä kenen kanssa koitin paeta kuoli ja jäin yksin. Sit jouduin ite tappamaan ihmisiä et pysyisin hengissä ja katsomaan ku mulle rakkaat ihmiset tappo toisiaan.. Eläimet tappo toisiaan.. Ei ollut kauheen mukavaa. Se oli oikeesti ku jostain kauhuelokuvasta... Sit viimesessä unessa mitä näin oltiin sen porukan kanssa oikeesti elokuvassa ja tiesin sen juonen ja jouduin neuvomaan kokoajan mitä muiden pitää tehdä, niinku et tapa toi ja toi koska muuten me kuollaan.. Kaikki liitty sellaseen teräksiseen oveen jonka takaa tuli kostonhimoisia eläimiä ja ihmisiä joita meidän piti auttaa tappamaan niit kenelle kuulu kostaa.. Jouduttiin tapatuttamaan viattomia ihmisiä ettei itse kuoltais.. Ja ei voitu muuta koska niin sen elokuvan kuului mennä.. Lopussa istuttiin pihapöydän ääressä ja katoin ku Arttu katkas jonku miehen kaulan tylsällä sahalla.. Se oli jotai niin oksettavaa ku se veri valu siihen pöydälle.. Mut se kuulu siihen juoneen koska se oli se pää-pahis. Me oltiin hyviksiä tietenki.. Silti jäi vähän traumat niist unista. Vaikka onnellinen loppu olikin..