-Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.
-Its been a rough day. I got up this morning .... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom.
-Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
-If you can't fix it with duck tape you have'nt used enough.
-Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.
-Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.
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