IRC-Galleria

-I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.
-I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system.
-"More fun than a barrel of monkeys." Has anyone ever stopped to think how cranky, if not downright vicious, a barrelful of monkeys would be, especially once released from the barrel?
-No matter how cynical I get I just canÂ’t keep up.
-Never play poker with a man called Doc. Never eat at a place called Mom's. Never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own.
-If you lend someone 20€, and never see that person again; it was probably worth it.
-Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental
-I had to hit him : he was starting to make sense.
-This could be entertaining, meaning embarrassing.
-You ever look up the word dictionary in a dictionary? A little hand comes out and smacks you one.
-I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
-If you are completely buried in an avalanche, dig a small hole around you and spit in it. The saliva will fall down, giving you an idea of which direction is up. Dig up.
-"Ed, I see you're out drinking again. What's the occasion?"
"I was sober."
-You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.
-After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, 'No hablo ingles.'
-There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.
-I'm a Leo. Leos don't believe in this astrology stuff.
-"We've done a terrible thing."
"Yes, if only there was some magical liquid that could erase bad memories..."
-Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.
-It was an accident officer. I was cleaning my fingernails. With a hunting knife. And he ran into me. Backwards. Fourteen times.
-Just because I have a short attention span doesn't mean I...
-I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.
-If I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.
-It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye, then it becomes a scavenger hunt.
-You need no longer worry about the future. This time tomorrow you'll be dead.
-You never know how many friends you have until you rent a house on the beach.
-You will be a winner today. Pick a fight with a four-year-old.