IRC-Galleria

stress...stressstressstress....stress..stress-stress....stresssssssssssssss
i'm stressed out :D
i have so much shit runing through my brain i think i might exsplode one huge KABOOM!
too many choices too may dramas, too many things in my head, i dont know if i'm coming or going if i'm up or down. i dont know what i want any more.... i have too many self issues, i have too many issues with people, i have to many issues with countries and politics.
AHHHHHHH.
and the worst thing is.... i cant talk about it with any one, because.. its too hard for people to understand, it too emotional, its too.... gah i dont know, i want so badly to just scream what i'm thinking, but i keep my mouth shut. why i dont know, i'm a loser i guess who cant exspress her emotions at people. I keep everything thats negitive bottled up, unless something triggers a release, whihc is being drunk or just exsploding! which is why i dont drink much any more because everything just exsplodes!
i wish i wasnt so... emotionally handicaped! because if i'm not showing enough emotion or reaction, i'm showing to much i cant win! And when i do try to exspress myself i freeze up and avoid it in the end, the only real way i can comunicate my true feelings is by writting them, and not even writting them to people, just letters upon letters. i think its because writting is so much less personal... and i can think about what i say, and i dont have to worry about the others reaction...

i wish everything would just stop... or slow down, so i had time to think...
everything is moving too fast, every one is moving too fast.
i want time to stop.. if only for a day...
it would be nice