IRC-Galleria

OMG shut up your so annoying, thats what i think about every one right now!

i think i am doomed to have to do all the work for every one else for the rest of my life, is it too much to ask for people to look after them selves and maybe every now and then give me a hand instead of it always being the other way round?
Not only did i find my own job and make my way across the earth.. TWICE. i found a job for my friend and my brother, i feed every one, i'm organsing to go back to finland, i finished school with really high grades and i'm completely independant and spend more of my time helping others with their shitty issues then my own.
is it so mucht o ask for a little compssion or sympathy?
i mean really
"oh Taryn ur throwing ur life away. blah blah blah blah"
"u'll be ok your taryn you'll make it back"
"you wont last a whole year there before you come back, your so comming back"
"hahahaha really it happened twice wow, how ever did u manage to do that"
"your so ungreatful, u live in the best country in the world"
"ohhh taryn my world is falling apart poor me poor me, pity me, give me attention"
"you dont do enough, you dont give enough"

i swear to god if i hear anything like that one more time, i will kill them.
i'm sick and tired of having to put myself second to every one else, i'm only 19 turning 20. i shouldnt have to worry about that kind of crap, i should be partying, but no because i'm 2 busy being 50!

i would love to have one week... no.. one day where i am not a constant ball of nerves, stress and worry about everything where i can just sit back and enjoy something, LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!

but no, because now we have a resession and everything is going up in price... plane tickets included, food, LIVING! and now i'm short money every month just to help my family pays bills.
gahhh.. stress.
i really dont give a fuck any more. i dont care if any one even reads this, i just need to vent it all out because i cant do it here with any one cause they are all DICKS! and it always... ALWAYS turns into something about my inability to stop ruining others lives and my own, cause itsssss alllll myyyyy FAULT isnt it!
i feel like breaking things, and yelling at people, i am just itching at the thought of someone trying to fight with me because i would destroy them, mentally and even more phiscially. i havent gotten into a fist fight with some one since i was 17... and gah... god how i wish i could do it again some times!