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yep, so here I am... I made it... actually all my exams with the best marsks and what... I feel more than depressed, I feel desperate
yes, I'm supposed to be near London from 23-6 until 23-9 and what... I feel I would kill myself
why I never can be happy at least for a minute? there is always have to be something what ruins it... kill me please (meaning it literally)

*praying for everything*
keeping my fingers crossed, maybe it will be all decided by the end of this week :P

my whole situation gets scary, the last two exams frighten me, because they are last and what if...
and then, the situation about summer, I even get text messages from unknown people O.o
but it's funny on the other hand
and today I found my dream again, not that much different from my old ones :D
so I pray to come true

too many things in one day *but I enjoyed after all, thx*

ovšemže myslím ten film...
byl nádhernej, úžasnej, opravdu super a po něm jsem zplodila tohle (v originále v Aj, ale nemůžu to sem hodit v Aj, prtž by tomu bylo rozumět):

"Dnes v noci jsem měla krásný sen...
slunce teple svítilo na písčitý břeh..
vánek si jemně pohrával s mými vlasy..
tak jsem zavřela oči a ucítila, jak někdo stojí velice blízko mě...
tak blízko, že jsem cítila jeho vůni..
jeho dech na mé tváři..
a ochutnala jeho duši skrze dotyk jeho sametových rtů...
Pak jsem otevřela oči a on byl pryč..
tak jsme se probudila a zjistila jsem, že to nebyl jenom sen..."

PS: Počet teček je důležitej, 2 = významná pomlka v hlase; 3 = nový odstavec :D

so I wrote a msg to Terka and she told me lots of very important info for me and so I decided,
I cannot go to Pori, at least not to that family
surprisingly I feel reliefe, but I feel scared of the fact, that I will probably stay here for the summer (that's my worse nightmare)
so let's hope

*reminds me of KWAN* when I'm in reminding, I remembered the 'quote' "Wake me up... when September ends" :) lovely

just few words for me to remember :)

You see = Jussi
You ha...ve = Juha with some kind of imagination

when I remembered the rest what I wanted to write down, I will add it (but I know my mind, it's unreliable)

oh and can't forget... I listen to uusi Sara all over again, I love more than just "Rauhan aika", I simply love the voice of Joa, but not only :)

edit: jo, ne = Jonne
ja, ne = Janne

Dekuju, dekuju, diky diky, kiita paljon, dikes, danke schön, ďakujem, muchas gracias, grazie ja merci!!!
Big big thank You for Your email, Your words made me feel better and gave me courage!
I will reply them and see, and You're right, the biggest fear is that I'm frightened of my lack of Finnish and I guess Terka studied Finnish at that time when she was there, so it wasn't a huge prob for her!

Oki, listening to Jennifer Lopez album Como Ama Una Mujer (nice title :D, I really need a recipe how to be a woman :D)... ah nice change and from tomorrow on I'm gonna learn law and economy, yay, can't wait (*saying ironicly*).

And now all of You just bow in front of Pee!!!! YOU RULEZ!!!

hehe I'm watching old Tik Tak live vids :D :D :D
it's prettyyyyy :P lol

I got it, okey, I don't know how to raise my motivation to learn that stupid accountancy, but I know how not to feel like a prisoner
just looking at old live videos (e. g. Placebo - Blind from Brno) brings me back to life, the memories work great
so next time when I need awaking up in the stereotype life of studying, I should go back to memories, mainly the music ones :P